Smoke

36 today, someone told me that I am her bosom friend. I just remembered that you sat behind me in that classroom that year, and told me with a smile in such a late night and in such a silent environment, I am your bosom friend. I dare not think about the dry seas and the broken rocks, but in the past three years, when everything in this world has not changed too much, I am already nothing in your heart. You can knead it at will, discard it at will, and play with it at will. You can even ignore me. It is no longer a pledge of eternal love, and there is no love, only regret and scolding. When every YILI of dust around me leaves me, my position in your heart is getting lower and lower. Your mouth will not talk about me any more, your eyes will not look at me any more, your mind will not think about me any more, your heart will no longer need me, when all this happens, you can let me go. Just, won’t I talk about you, look at you, think about you, need you? Once, I am all of you, you can do anything for me; Now, he is all of you, but I can do anything for you. I am not a confidant. I just happened to say a few words to make the other person appreciate. Confidant or something, unless I am carried away, this is absolutely unacceptable. However, I believed it at that time. I thought you wouldn’t lie to me, I am bosom friend, I am your bosom friend, I am the person you can’t lose. As a result, I became a joke, a joke that even I would laugh when I remembered it. I don’t know whether I am a bosom friend or not, but I know that the only thing that can test everything in this world is time. Therefore, please let time flow away and let it wash. I don’t care if I am another person’s confidant. What I care about is whether my love for you is true. I firmly believe that time can tell me the answer, and perhaps I don’t care about that answer either. Dear, I am confused, you are still the same. 37 unconsciously found that it was my inexplicable happiness to think of you in quiet time. I don’t know why an idea suddenly appeared in my head. You will call me in the next second, just like in the past, I can’t bear not to communicate with me and talk with me. I was actually thinking about how I would answer when you called me. I may ask first: Are you Han, little, or my girlfriend? If it is Han, I think I will hang up; It is Xiao, I will greet you with a smile, it is my girlfriend, I can’t wait to tell you, I really have been waiting for you, I miss you, I really, really miss you. I am passionate again, happy, happy, and with him, where will you think of me again and need me? In your world full of sunshine, where can you take care of my lingering life in my dark and humid corner? I always thought this was a nightmare that would wake up. After so long, I slapped myself countless times, but I still felt so, even though I had already been black and blue all over. Looking forward to, awakening, open your eyes and see you again the first time. Dear, you are my love. The love that is only once in a lifetime is not for forever, but for love with a clear conscience. It turned out that I didn’t know until today that the three years with you were a dream, a dream that I would never want to wake up. Dream, you, reality, but only me. 38 episodes? What does this mean? Looking at your nickname, I am thinking over and over again. It’s not difficult again, is it? Isn’t it hurt again? That man hurt you, didn’t he? I think, worried, scared, but unable to do anything beneficial for you. I have been thinking hard for a long time, but I still can’t sleep and can’t put you down. I will ask Xin to call you tomorrow and hope she can help you. Dear, I don’t know if she can do anything for you. I just hope my intuition is right. You need the help of a person and a good friend. If it is the original, I am the best person to comfort you, although I am not how to comfort people. I will make you laugh, or make you cry. If you have cried and laughed, you will put down the distress in your heart and turn back to the woman I would like to hold but not put down forever. You said that the wedding day would be Princess hug, and I silently promised you. The dream I had was to make you the most beautiful bride in the world, and I became the happiest groom, holding you until the ends of the Earth. I have to tell you a news that disappointed you. My level 4 has not been there. In fact, I have known this result for a long time. When thinking about the exam, apart from you or you in my mind, how could I feel about what kind of ghost English to take. However, I haven’t had the exam. I don’t care. There are still plenty of opportunities. I also fully believe in myself. But will you come back if you leave? Why am I confident to face you? I told myself that I would go to your school one day, leave behind the past love and resentment, and simply walk with pure emotion. I want to know, in the years after you left me, what kind of environment you live in, I want to guess what your life looks like with my imagination. In the play, I am the person you least give up; Outside the play, you are the person I expect most. 39 recently, the enthusiasm for writing this thing has declined a little. Sometimes I want to write but I don’t want to do it. Feel that pain is greater than happiness. It is not that there is no theme to write, although it has been almost half a year, but for me, everything in those three years happened just now. I remember it clearly. Why not write it? I am afraid that I can’t write well. What I spoil is my memory and my love for you. I wanted to write something else, such as a paper, but it turned out that I am had no intention to write anything else before finishing this thing. You are my only and all, and you occupy my little heart. This chapter is just a transition. I have to think about how to write and how to live. The three most important fragments I can think of are Phoenix, Yunnan and breakup. Consider that there are many others that need to be inserted. I have always been confident, and suddenly I feel that it is quite stressful to write completely, not to mention whether I can write better. It is stressful to write this. I am always thinking about whether it is worth it. What complaints are there for the three years that have passed away and been precious to me? However, you are not you, is it still worth it? While thinking about the answer, I thought about the past and wrote a story. Just ask for a little change in my world after finishing the last stroke. You can forget me, you can slander me, you can choose him, you can flatter him, but please don’t insult my most precious three years of youth, those three years have yours, happy, my years. Yesterday, I asked Xin to call you to ask about your recent situation. When I knew that nothing happened to you, I was very happy, so happy that I smiled foolishly. My worries are unnecessary. You don’t need my worries. Your heart is no longer open for me. I am the redundant person, so I am not even qualified to call you personally. Dear, you must be good. This is what I pray every day. All I can do is recall. Besides, I can do nothing. 40 there is a very profound thing in my impression: When we crossed the park at the gate of the school together, beside the artificial lake, a man dressed like a monk came towards us. While talking a lot, he put two strings of beads in our hands respectively. Of course, then he made an excuse to pay. What he said is not clearly remembered. It is nothing more than the donor asking for charity. I took out 10 yuan to give it to him without hesitation, and he left quickly with the money. After that, you blamed me, obviously a liar. Why did you give him money? I smiled without saying a word, but looked down at you. In fact, I knew why in my heart. A year later, I went to Huaihua, and I remember that similar things happened in Huaihua. It was not long after I arrived at my destination. It was a night when I walked on the main road with you, and you took me to find delicious food to eat. At a turning point, we met a father and daughter. Father and daughter came along like us and said a lot. Of course, to sum up, they were nothing more than hungry. Let’s help. I didn’t say much. I remembered that I didn’t have any change at that time, so I had to buy two bottles of water for them in the nearby store. Yes, I was cheated again. After my father and daughter left, you still scolded me, saying why can’t I distinguish the true from the false? Are you willing to fall for it? My answer, I can tell you now. I don’t care whether they are true or not, nor whether they really need help. All I care about is the time with you. I hope I can do as much as possible, as far as possible not to be disturbed, as far as possible without regret, in short, that is, as perfect as possible. I am afraid that if they are really true and we are not helpful, then there is not a layer of regret between us? Now think about it, that string of Buddha beads is still collected by me, but you have already left me. It is true or false, but it is true or false. Where can I distinguish it?

Zan (prose editor: Jiangnan wind) Phoenix Mountain Spring Tour

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